How To Overcome Shyness And Social Anxiety | 4 STEPS TO BE MORE CONFIDENT

How to be confident, even if you are a shy person. So in this video I'm going to share with you the tips and tricks on how you could build your confidence and be shy no more. So for those of you who don't know who I am, I'm Linh Podetti and welcome to my channel, by the way. I'm here to help you achieve time and financial freedom. But before I go on, if you're new to this channel, please help and support by liking my video and subscribing to my channel. You'll be updated with my new videos every single week. Okay. So let's get straight into my video about how to actually stop being shy. So for those of you who don't know me well, you probably think that I'm a very brave, assertive person. So confident, she's just born that way. But no, I can tell you that I was a very shy person, shy kid. So I was born in Vietnam and so the culture there raises a lot of shy kids. We were taught in schools to never put our hands up, to not make mistakes. You'll see that the whole culture is timid kind of people. So when I came to Australia, every single parent teacher interview, the teachers were complaining that she's too shy. Every teacher interview, I was getting the same report, which made me really frustrated with myself because I knew I had capability. I knew the answers to things, but I was too shy to put my hands up or to participate because I didn't want to get the answers wrong. But because I received this report every single time my parents came to my interview, it said your daughter needs to participate more. She needs to contribute more. I became really frustrated with myself because I knew I could do better, and that was when I decided to combat my shyness. So nowadays when I tell people that I used to be a shy person, no one believes me because I have just transformed into this new confident person. So my message to you is if I can do it, you can do it. Okay? So if you're born shy, always been shy, it doesn't always have to be that way. You can change yourself. So let me share with you the four tips on how you can actually do that, or four steps that you can actually do. Okay, so step one, it's about changing how you identify yourself. If you always go around saying that I'm a shy person, I am the shy type, you are identifying yourself as this is who you are always going to be. It limits you from being able to change. But being shy is really a behavior. You are acting shy, you are saying things to yourself that's causing you to be shy. But if you can tell yourself that I'm only shy because I don't know how to have the strategies to stop being shy, then it gives you that capability to change. But if you're saying that, I am a shy person, it's as if you're saying that you can't change who you are, but being shy is a behavior, then that's how you can empower you to stop being shy. Shy is just an act, it's a behavior. So step two is stop thinking about yourself. So let's say you're doing public speaking and you're feeling shy, you're feeling nervous. Start think about how your message or your delivery is going to change other people's lives. Or if you're a comedian, you love to make people laugh, but when you're about to go on stage or about to talk in front of or about to tell your jokes in front of 10 people, you start to feel shy. Well, think about how you'll make them feel, they're going to feel so happy or they get to laugh because of your performance. So when you start to think about how you can serve others, you stop to think and worry about yourself. It's like don't worry about how you look or worry about how you dress. It's really about, okay, if I could really put in my best performance, I'm going to be able to add value to people. So when I decided that I wasn't going to be shy anymore, I started to think about contributing to the class versus thinking about how everyone's going to look at me. I looked at it as, well, I want to add value to my class. I wanted to share them answers. I want to ask questions so that I can add value to other people. So that's how you stop thinking too much about yourself. Now the third step is changing the way you talk to yourself. So when you're shy, you're saying, oh my God, there's so many people, I can't do this. I'm a shy person. Other people can because they are not a shy person. They were born that way. All these limiting beliefs that you're saying to yourself is actually stopping you from changing your behavior. So you need to start to identify the way you are saying things. You need to actually say, if they can do it, I can do it. I might feel shy right now, or my heart might be pounding right now, but I can do it. So it's really about, even if you don't believe it yet, but it's telling yourself I can, it's already shifting you to the right direction. Because if you say, I can't, you're already freezing yourself. You're not going to do anything about it because you said you can't. But if you say, I'm feeling like this, I'm feeling nervous, whatever, but I can do this, I can, I can, then you are going to be able to take the next action. So the next action is just do it. So every single time I felt nervous, I still feel nervous nowadays when I go into a new group of people in front of people. As much as I love networking, I am a bubbly person, I love people, but I still have my shy moments. But I ignore that and I just do it. It's like you might feel nervous anticipating that you're about to do a talk or do a presentation, but the moment you just do it, you're already in it and you'll get over all your feelings. The more you practice not being shy by just doing things that you don't feel comfortable with, you will eventually turn into a confident person because practice makes perfect. It's like if you're riding a bike, at the beginning you're going to fall down. You're going to fall down because you don't know how to do it. But once you know how to ride a bike, you can ride a bike, even with your eyes closed sort of thing. Or if you haven't ride a bike for 10 years, you still know how to ride a bike. Same as with practicing to stop being shy. It's really about just confronting your fear and just going, I can do it. You don't want to put your hands up, but you just do it anyway. Or you don't want to say something, but you just do it anyway. The many times that you do that, you'll eventually feel so confident that it becomes a lot easier to be confident. So I'm not saying that, even myself, like I said, I'll have my shy moments, but I constantly remind myself that if I can do it in the past, I can do it again. If I feel any part of myself feeling fearful, I just commit to doing it. So there you go. It's a four step process. It's really about first, don't identify yourself as being a shy person because that limits you. You need to change it to changing your shy behavior. The second one is to think about others. How can you serve others rather than thinking about yourself? That will make you feel less selfish and you get out of your shell more. Then the third one is saying, I can, I can do it, even despite your feelings of nervousness. Yeah. Then finally just do it. Do it again and again and again until shy becomes this little thing and confidence becomes this big thing. Cool. So if you love my video, if you have any questions, please let me know. If you do like this video, please support by subscribing to my channel. Before you go though, I would love to hear what you believe. If you're a shy person right now, what is it stopping you from? By being shy, what are the missed opportunities that you're having because of your shyness? Because when I used to think about my shyness, I was thinking, well, how am I going to grow? How am I going to succeed in life if I keep being shy, and shyness stopped me from taking action or, or getting out there? So I want to hear from you guys, how has shyness stopped you from achieving your dreams? Thank you so much for watching and I'll see you next week.

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